By Kelly Cristine Barbosa Cherulli
Psychologist and Sexologist
When it comes to the human sexuality many clangers are dropped and blunders are done to just being disclosed along the way. In this instance a certain mix-up between sexuality and Sex is quite common.
When talking about Sex we can refer to the gender- specific male-female, feminine-masculine, man-woman as to the Sex-act, the sexual relation that involves two individuals. As for sexuality, implies desire, values and life’s twists and turns, those sentiments provoked or resulted from the bonding of two individuals.
The human being begins to develop sexuality as a baby searching for pleasure, physical and emotional well being by interacting with the surroundings.
The infantile sexuality is for instance somewhat different from the adult sexuality - it’s simple, naive and downright sensorial. The child feels pleasure through the senses- as in being breast fed, in discovering one’s body, by socializing and discovering the anatomical differences between sexes and therefore questioning grown-ups.
The adolescent’s sexuality is as adult a similar as intense. At the beginning they go through physical transformations which bring about frustrations from bodily and behavioral transformations. Teens re-discover their own physics, consequently their sexuality by experimenting through new relationships and sensations a new way to understand themselves better.
How an adolescent perceives his/hers body, Sex (self-image), feelings (self-esteem) will influence significantly his/hers sexuality. Masturbation in this phase is the first and primarily source, on which he/she encounters to reach out and satisfy his/hers physical and emotional needs.
Most parents become disappointed and without knowing how to act wind up repressing and many times reproaching the adolescent. That way renders the adolescent feeling guilty, who in turn feels disconnected without letting his/hers feelings show parents. Parents should encourage the adolescent to disclose any concealed hang-up. In this case, the best way forward is by keeping an eye, and thus reaching out for the youth without invading their privacy (it’s their right after all). Relatives should only worry about masturbation, in case it happens in an exacerbated manner, so far as interfering in the daily activities, or in the familiar and social sphere. It could well be a hunch that his/hers expectations may not being fulfilled.
The adolescent’s behavior is likely to be based on experiences perceived initially in the home ambiance and afterwards on his/hers own experiences outside home boundaries. on their future relationships there would be a tendency to repeat such way of interacting with others. Feelings such as guilt and remorse are useless. Relatives should provide information that would go further beyond bare anatomical explanations, which ought to be passed on with accuracy and confidence. If that comes to be the case seek professional aid.
Sex is something natural, try a casual approach. Remember that sexuality is inherent to human beings and follows us all along. To exercise sexuality at its best takes reassurance, understanding and heaps of love.